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"Happiness feels like heaven, and its memory is reason for hope

when life makes it hard to breathe, and days seem impossible to face."

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When the seat in which I sit, the size of the earth in which I explore, becomes so beautiful that my mind can no longer accept it to be real, my reality becomes controlled by the very imagination that tries so hard to understand it.

I force myself to journey away from the very heaven I have found and I am left alone with myself and the ripple in the water in which my reflection now lies.



As I look into his being I find only ugliness as my mind cannot escape the eyes staring back. Fighting to choose whether to breathe, to live, and to keep my candle a flame as the world I share with my reflection smothers and blinds me from the universe in which I now feel abandoned, I have no choice but to decide,

Do I leave the knife where it lies, or take it, so that I can esape the heaven I no longer can find?

The universe, through all this, I fear, more than anything. My life, through all this, I hate even more.

This book

 is a conversation, I had with myself.

THIS BOOK is more than

THE MIND that created it.

This book is not just about my mental health challenges, but more about my imagination, the beauty it can see and transform into its own creation, and my mind that for a period of time allowed itself to decay and almost give up entirely, while creating nothing but despair through words that suffer. This very mind eventually comes to a state of acceptance and grows to create nothing but beauty that through art can be preserved in its entirety.

This book is intended to be a work of art.

As an artist, I feel it reveals a truth about myself that is both brutally honest and hauntingly beautiful. The writing throughout is as real and poetic as I could possibly attempt to make it. The art that sits beside it, connects to the very truth written on each page.

This book is not just about mental health, and that is something I, as the writer, am starting to realize. This book is about life. In this life we very often suffer, sometimes more so than others. Sometimes we, ourselves, force ourselves into this state. But in this life we have the ability to escape this very suffering, as we have the ability to transform our thoughts into a positive direction that guides us to a comforting future. In this life we have the ability to let go of the past, focus on the present, and aim for the future, so that we can carry a mind that is under control. This is the greatest challenge I have ever been faced with as a man, and the proudest accomplishment I have ever had no choice but to achieve.


In this book I start off by stating I want to help the world.

In the end my words end up helping myself. These very words could do the same for others.

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My wings take me here.

The wind is the reason.

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