Thank You Mom For Letting Me See… Ten Years of Heaven

By Blake R. Horsley

 

 

 

 

Over and over

I think of my mom

Over and over

I think what should have come

She was sweet

She was innocent

But she suffered

She was kind

She was affectionate

But she suffered

Why did my mom have to struggle?

Why did my mom not have an easier life?

Why did my mind want to give up?

Why did my mind want to pick up the knife?
I was seven when she tried to leave

I was seven when I saw her struggle just to breathe

But she came through

And blamed no one for her pain

Even when the clouds were gray

Even when the sky poured rain

Mom, stay with me

Mom, please don’t leave

Mom, understand this

I am not mad at you

And ten years since you’ve passed

I still miss you

You gave me my life

You gave my dad kisses and hugs

And you were loved, more than anything

By God up above

And a family that wanted to give you nothing but care and affection

With a son who just wanted to love you for all of our shared blessings

My older brother is my hero

And you shaped him into a good man

One I could turn to

When life just made pain hard to understand

To this day

I cannot comprehend

Why your mind played tricks on you

And why your sadness wanted to consume

And defeat you

But you never gave up

Even when you cried for help

Even when I was twelve

And you needed me to be strong enough

To be a hero

Just for a day

Today I am proud because,
Though, you are gone

You let me save you so that you could live on

And you did for many years

And now it has been many years since I’ve seen you

You have been gone from this earth since September 19th, 2013

But you are still with me almost every night that I dream

I love you with all my heart

And I remember the pain

But I am content now

Because I am finally okay

Even under the rain

Okay enough to face any day

To be honest, more than anyone

You made it that way

I miss you phoning me

I miss you saying hello

I miss you rubbing my head

And our love, I’ll never let go

You were an angel on earth

And to everyone who knew you

You had so much worth

And more than anything I must thank you for my life

A life that you gave birth

Thank you mom for staying with me in spirit

Thank you mom for bringing heaven down to me

Thank you mom for giving me life

Thank you mom

For letting me see

I am positive

Your spirit is free